Probably Brilliant

    6 Aug 2008

    Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

    (Hat Tip: ali-with-an-i and the Radar)

    1. mikeyllorin reblogged this from kayfabe
    2. jakec reblogged this from aidenpyne and added:
      HALF OF THESE ARE SIMILES. HOW DID THESE “TEACHERS” GRADUATE?
    3. notsharon reblogged this from livejamie and added:
      a deep, throaty, genuine laugh,...that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.”
    4. thepeacoat reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    5. moneyissues reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
    6. sraz reblogged this from livejamie and added:
      ohmy, this is hilarious!
    7. tyce reblogged this from livejamie
    8. urbanpringle reblogged this from dallasw and added:
      Yeah. we got that. help.com didn’t.
    9. dallasw reblogged this from urbanpringle and added:
      are all similes!
    10. badwobot reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    11. percepto reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      faves are #11 and #19 - priceless.
    12. myfirstsodabread reblogged this from hugehuge and added:
      I like 19: Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
    13. hugehuge reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    14. urbanpringle reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      These students are pretty darn creative actually. If I were...teacher these submissions...
    15. justfeisty reblogged this from libbylovesnyc
    16. aidenpyne reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      Fav is: 6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever.
    17. amandemic reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      Number 3 had me in hysterics!
    18. heylookathatree reblogged this from shannern and added:
      um, i have no words. only tons of laughter.
    19. vulturepiano reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      I prefer: She grew on him like she...colony of E. coli, and he was room temperature...
    20. meghangrace reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      These are similes, not metaphors, but still funny.
    21. ruaarnold reblogged this from livejamie and added:
      I love them all, but my two favorites were: Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the...
    22. culby reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      (Hat Tip: ali-with-an-i and the Radar)
    23. jamiea reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      I love number 11: “From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when...
    24. theandrewbrown reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    25. rainbowhill reblogged this from livejamie and added:
      I really hate to rain pedantically on your parade but, bar one, these are all examples of simile. You know, I never met...
    26. libbylovesnyc reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
    27. baronvoncrunk reblogged this from ohthehumanity and added:
      Amazing. Especially the Jeopardy one.
    28. andrewglennflavin reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    29. corcoranm reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    30. amilniazi reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      I hope everyone’s getting the message here, which...kids are stupid.
    31. iichlits reblogged this from clablr and added:
      colony of E. coli, and he was room temperature Canadian beef.”
    32. clablr reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound...dog makes just before it throws up.
    33. johnthomas reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    34. skar reblogged this from brocatus and added:
      What about this one: 25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were
    35. brocatus reblogged this from livejamie and added:
      Forgot to add my own favorite; “The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.”...
    36. cchausman reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      I love this one right here: 10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like...Hefty...
    37. kim reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      I think I had an email of something like this
    38. verydefinitely reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      faves are no. 4 and 23: 4. She grew on him like she...colony of E. coli, and he was room...
    39. kicksterflixter reblogged this from jamienguyenle
    40. souvenirs reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      One of my favorites: 6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever.
    41. ieatyouruterus reblogged this from amphibian and added:
      hahahaha i love this nikita x]
    42. agsystems reblogged this from livejamie and added:
      “Funny metaphors similies used in high school essays” 12. Her hair glistened in the rain
    43. bbbrad reblogged this from livejamie
    44. looznooz reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    45. nikita-banana reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    46. amphibian reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like...guy who went blind...
    47. jamienguyenle reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    48. hellointernet reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever.
    49. baotran reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      these are hilarious
    50. restlessruminations reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      These made me smile. Several of them are quite clever, albeit silly.
    51. kayfabe reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
    52. somageek reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    53. emmiryrai reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    54. shannern reblogged this from livejamie and added:
      I’m SO using these this year. What will I get in trouble for more: bad metaphors or plagiarizing?
    55. areid reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      Metaphors I plan to use in daily conversation....favorite is number 11: “From the attic...
    56. livejamie reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:
      My favorite: “John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.”
    57. pwnedbylorna reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      I read all this before sometime ago, but I still like them. I love great analogies.
    58. okayjokesover reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like...guy who went blind...
    59. markyb reblogged this from superdoofus-stratodrive and added:
      22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from...
    60. superdoofus-stratodrive reblogged this from whatson and added:
      after reading that list it looks like palahniuk’s new noir novel is writing itself! missing as of yet: the factoids he...
    61. tleslieb reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      Anna… you need to read these.. it will crack you up. Yes I know that I just singled out one reader, but I know she will...
    62. whatson reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    63. heh reblogged this from ali-with-an-i
    64. luap reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      favorite by far: 6. Her vocabulary...bad as, like, whatever. Which reminds me of the...
    65. ahhmanda reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound...dog makes just before it throws up. that’s...
    66. ohthehumanity reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      laughing so hard I cried.
    67. ashhol reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      lol 20. The plan...simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just...
    68. dangbooty reblogged this from jlovely and added:
      I believe these are called similies. Still, they gave me a smile when reading them, though.
    69. chelynne reblogged this from alilbit and added:
      I love this. Heeheehee!
    70. dazzlingdelta reblogged this from katysaidso and added:
      holy crap im going to love reading this
    71. katysaidso reblogged this from jlovely and added:
      I LOL’d at no. 12, “Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.”
    72. jlovely reblogged this from missbrightside and added:
      “25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.”
    73. rackattack reblogged this from jona
    74. alilbit reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
    75. setuplikeadeckofcards reblogged this from chimp-shitbitch-kittenscrazy and added:
      My favourite is No. 11. It’s funny, but it’s also pretty expressive. I know exactly what they mean: “The whole scene had...
    76. chimp-shitbitch-kittenscrazy reblogged this from jaclynday
    77. raindelays reblogged this from missbrightside
    78. missbrightside reblogged this from jaclynday and added:
      “Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.” LOL.
    79. transformersandnails reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:
      Oh, Phil. 20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
    80. bmiller reblogged this from jaclynday and added:
      I will go with No. 14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each...
    81. allisonandgeoffrey reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:
      Love this one - super romantic: She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it...
    82. furth reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
    83. theipodguru reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
    84. cwags reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:
      My favorite is Mr. Literal #3: He spoke with...wisdom that can only come from...
    85. jona reblogged this from jaclynday and added:
      Thank you for the nice, hearty laugh this morning. A laugh so hearty, it was almost as if it came out of a Campbell’s...
    86. yourpalmal reblogged this from jaclynday and added:
      My favorite was #3: He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he...
    87. lrusso reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling
    88. bensley reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      Haha great stuff! Actually makes me feel like writing
    89. reallykatie reblogged this from onemoretimewithfeeling and added:
      16. “John and Mary...never met. They were...two hummingbirds...
    90. onemoretimewithfeeling reblogged this from jaclynday and added:
      “From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in...
    91. gmayfair reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      HA! 20. The plan...simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just...
    92. jaclynday reblogged this from ali-with-an-i and added:
      I LOL’d at no. 19: Shots rang out,...shots are wont to do.
    93. ali-with-an-i posted this